I am pretty sure I covered some of this in my last post, but, let me go in to a bit more detail…
In short, I really expected the business to take off. To be so successful that we would literally have to turn people away because we could not keep up with the demand. I guess you could call it arrogance. That is, my take on how I thought things would go leading in to August 6th. I knew how great the breads tasted, and looked for that matter. The test runs we did with potential customers went very well. And really, I saw only the sky as the limit. Ok, yes, the sky is the limit, but, be sure to note there are cloudy days and we cannot always go quite so far.
The reality is that the business was so slow coming in to December that we went to a four day week for a few weeks, and I spent countless nights unable to sleep, worrying about how we would generate more income.
If I am being very honest, and I am, some days I would cry myself to sleep, wondering what it was I kept doing wrong, which did not bring more people in to the bakery. I worry so much about my expectations being a reality, when in fact, the results are what make up the reality, not my ideas of the results.
I never expected us to do tapas. Who would have thought that a bakery would be serving tapas, but, now here we are, doing tapas every Friday night. The last few leading in to the closing of the year were sold out. That is a very good feeling for sure. But, the reality of the bakery is that we needed to offer more things, not just bread, croissants, and cookies, but an array of options, including an evening spot where people could come and enjoy themselves without feeling hungry as they left.
I suppose we will continue to do tapas.. hehehehehe 🙂
and back to bread for a moment…
I am so surprised that people do not buy more baguettes. They are big, they taste great, have a nice crust and crumb, and the cost is very low. Is it not a Spanish thing? Many of days, we are storing them in the freezer to give to a friend who feeds some animals near her home. To me, it is silliness. I love a baguette with avocado and tomato as an example and as I am writing this, I am getting hungry for some right now.
Money was my biggest misstep with an expectation. I really thought for sure we would be making more money, and living with less stress from month to month. The expenses of owning the business are so high, I understand clearly how many are going under after such short periods of time. Combine this with a landlord who makes life miserable and you have a recipe for disaster. We will get to both money and that man later on…
And I did not expect my private relationships to change so much. Some times for the better and some times for the worse. Sandy and I had many very rough moments. Much worse than I expected and will go in to. For me, I take it day to day and hope for the best. And, more importantly, I take the next passing moments as new beginnings. Holding on to what I think is right is not always the best solution.
Another relationship has me still a bit sore. Someone had offered to help me multiple times. Even to the point where I offered money for help. And, every time I got to where I was sure I was going to get the much needed help, it never happened. I do not know what to make of that to be honest, but, my reality now is I just do not worry about it. I will fail on my own and those failures will either close the business, or make me better. I love that person. I do not love the waiting and hoping and wishing, and then nothing. In the end, this is my fault because I always say that I never want to have expectations from anyone, but I open myself up and think that some things will happen and they didn’t and so I was left feeling empty inside. It is a learning. I know now that I can really only rely on me, and that is how it should be <3
I have more reality check expectations, but maybe it is better to stop here, or you may fall asleep. Thank you so much for taking the time to keep up.